I want to share some relationship advice with you today that may have an impact on your relationship.
When we believe we aren't getting what we want from a relationship—by this, I mean a relationship that has previously been successful—our emotions can run wild and confound us. We may experience a sense of being stuck or numb due to a sense of loss and not knowing what to do.
It is possible that negative, counterproductive emotions are affecting your behaviour within the relationship. They can cloud your view of what is needed in your relationship and the true nature of your partner's intent. They can affect your responses, communication, and physical affection, all of which affect the relationship negatively.
This may be having a negative effect, not only on the relationship but how you feel about yourself and your partner. When we are controlled by these emotions we don't tend to feel good about ourselves or who we have become within the relationship. We can sometimes blame our partner for this and look for what they are doing or not doing that we don't like. We can also look for what is missing in the relationship and come to conclusions that it is wrong for us.
These emotions are brought about by feelings of:
Fear:
that things will be worse or similar to what they are today in the future.
that leaving the relationship is the only course of action because it is unhealthy.
that leaving is also the incorrect move. What if you end the relationship only to discover that the new one ends almost exactly the same way?
All of this can be really unsettling. It distances a person from their true selves. It forces individuals into a position where they begin to act against their morals and principles.
Failure:
I shouldn't be heard or loved because I'm not good enough.
Everything I do is wrong.
I'm solely to blame.
There are numerous more bad feelings that can cause someone to become defensive, trapped, and withdrawn to the point that they are shielding themselves from the outside world. If your partner is a part of this and is engaging in it as well, the relationship is very precarious.
Courage
Well, having courage may also be frightening. Having courage sometimes is very vulnerable, opening ourselves up to possible rejection or judgment requires courage.
However, courage can spur someone to investigate the true nature of the relationship's problems. To better understand their partner and how they "tick," one may be inspired to take action. The desire to enhance one's relationship and emotional state can inspire someone to seek assistance.
Therefore, when I talk about Fear, Failure, and Courage, I'm urging you to think about these possibilities and determine which condition you're in for yourself. Fear can be emotionally draining because it often doesn't result in action. Failure makes you helpless and stuck.
Encourage yourself to have the courage to alter your emotions and mental narratives so that you can explore what might be rather than what you currently think is the case.
The bravery to do so will also be present if you feed your mind's curiosity and drive to act. The fear of doing nothing will go as a result.
Relationships end for the wrong reasons so frequently. Keep that from happening to yours. Sometimes all it takes to get things back on track and even better is a little courage.
I see so many couples who have lost their way in their relationship because they misread one another's signals and feel inadequate to one another. It may require bravery to learn and comprehend what is truly occurring in your relationship and why, but courage results in illumination and knowledge for them. These couples' courage provides them with the solutions they've been seeking.
Instead of dread, let courage be what propels you forward.
Get in touch with me today to book your complimentary consultation and take the first step towards a happy marriage or relationship.
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