We often neglect our relationship until we are so unhappy we don't know how to change it. It seems like a huge task, and it is overwhelming.
Here is a list of simple yet effective ways to set your relationship on a better track starting at this very moment.
All of these things add up to a loving, fulfilling, secure and peaceful relationship with trust and and a strong foundation.
Commit to making a change: If you have been making other areas of your life a priority over your relationship, now is the time to commit to putting your partner at the top of your list! We get what we focus on; if you're not paying attention to your partner, then your relationship will suffer. We all need to feel significant, especially from our spouse.
Take responsibility and hold yourself accountable: We cannot control or change another person. What we can do is take charge of our own behaviour, choices and actions. Empower yourself today. Know that you can make changes because you have committed to it and because you want to. You change first and your partner will follow.
Stop blaming and criticising your partner: when we blame our partners, how does it make them feel? How do you think your partner wants to feel in your relationship? Would they like to feel happy, valued, calm, comfortable with who they are, loved and approved of? All of those feelings will diminish if they feel criticised or blamed. Please pay attention to their strengths, qualities and values and let go of their flaws or imperfections; we all have them.
Pay attention!: Are you paying your partner enough attention each day? Are you making time for just them? Do you send them a message to let them know you are thinking of them? Or just to ask them to pick up some milk? Are you making time each day where you are focusing 100% on them? No phone or TV or distractions? If not, then how will you know how they are?
Be grateful: Gratitude is the fastest way to change how you and your partner feel. What are you grateful for about them? What values do they have that you admire? What do they do for you? Expressing gratitude for the smallest things means a great deal; it makes them feel seen, loved, appreciated and valued. Write a list of things that you are grateful for about them and tell and show them several times a day whenever you get a chance, and watch them change how they react to you. When people feel unappreciated at their core, they will shut down their feelings of love and affection, and resentment will breed.
Be empathic: Do your best to see things from their perspective before you react. Your partner will thank you for it.
Let go of being right: What is more important, being right or being in a happy relationship? Our addiction to being right makes our partner wrong, and who is happy being told they are wrong? No - one!
Be nice: This is the most obvious thing you can do, but unfortunately, in some relationships, people are not nice to each other! Be kind to your spouse, and they will respond accordingly. Be your partner's best friend, be on their side and they will love you for it.