None of us get married thinking we may get divorced one day.
Many people however, (42% in the UK to be exact) find themselves doing just that.
My main reason for specialising in Relationship Coaching is because of my family values and my concern for the emotional and financial costs of divorce for couples and their children.
I have been told, by clients who have worked with me, that what they have gained from coaching has been "invaluable", "priceless" and "you can't put a price on it."
One husband told me that he would have paid thousands more than what he had paid in order to get the happy marriage he and his wife have now, and initially, he was my most sceptical client to date!
However, for potential new clients, often the financial and time investment is a serious decision to make.
I mean, how can you put a price on your marriage? You can't, but you can look at the alternative, which may be divorce.
If you look around my website you will see evidence of couples whose relationships have been transformed by attending coaching but it does not escape me that these couples have achieved this because they have been willing to financially invest in their marriage, to prevent them from heading down the road to divorce, where the costs would be many times the investment for coaching.
So, let's have a look at what the cost of divorce can be in England and Wales.
When a couple separates or divorces, they average spend £14,561 on lifestyle and legal expenses, up 17% from 2014's total of £12,432
The total cost of separation expenses in the UK has risen by £100 million since 2014 to £1.7 billion.
16 percent of those who split also purchase a new property, forking over an average of £144,600.
51 percent of those who divorce use the rental market, which has an average yearly cost of £7,519 due to affordability concerns.
Divorce-related legal costs more than doubled from £1,280 in 2014 to £2,679 in 2017.
After a divorce, the average time it takes to settle financial issues is 14.5 months, three months longer than in 2014.
Add to this child maintenance and other expenses relating to your unique situation the cost of divorce is extremely high.
The emotional cost with the heartache and pain, feelings of loss, stress and potentially living in a different house from your children can be traumatic, to say the least. The upheaval and turmoil of a divorce can last many years, for the couple, their children, and extended family.
This makes me incredibly sad. I wonder how many of these divorces could have been prevented had the couple been given the best information, tools, guidance and awareness that could have healed their relationship.
Relationship skills are not taught in school and yet our relationships are the most important part of a healthy happy life. The pain caused in relationships can be immense so why aren't we shown how to create and be in one that we love?
A lot of couples separate because they simply do not know what else to do to make things better. They don't know where to turn.
Divorce is not what they want but they see no other option.
Of course, there are some couples who are not meant to be together, they just aren't good together, and for those couples divorce may seem like a relief. But if you feel like divorce is really wrong for you then maybe it is too soon to give up.
My current coaching package for 6 x 2-hour sessions is £997.
I am confident that way before the end of these 6 sessions you will have experienced significant improvements in your relationship, and possibly, depending on how much effort you have put in and your individual circumstances, you may not require any more sessions after this.
The cost of divorce emotionally is immeasurable and financially far greater than this.
This is a small fraction of the financial cost of divorce and a choice that would help you to feel happier and proud that you did everything you could to save your marriage.
8 sessions could be all that you need to turn your marriage around and know for sure that you want to be together.
Many of my clients finish their coaching journey with a new relationship - with the same spouse, and how does it get better than that?
Book your consultation here and get the ball rolling on saving your marriage today.